SOL 119, Great One 110: SOL remains undefeated thanks to an improbable Player of the Week performance from . . . Tet McMillan? That can’t be right.
Yankees 117, Guns 113.5: Yankees remains undefeated thanks to the Waiver Wire Pickup of the Week . . . Will Reichard.
Factory 110.5, Chumps 104.5: If Brian Robinson had vultured one more of Bijan’s TDs we’d be talking about the most unlikely comeback win in league history.
Weasels 103.5, Mayhem 76: The football gods are punishing me for my awful Week 2 AI-assisted joke about red crosses by assigning one to every single player on Mayhem’s roster.
Torpedoes 98, Snappers 54.5: Hey, they can’t all be squeakers.
MSG 91, Maulers 90.5: MSG got a double goose-egg from two players who didn’t even stat and still won.
LEAGUE BIDNESS
I sent an email to CBS about the locked player trade that went through, and as expected they didn’t say anything about it, though they did “rerun the stats” which updated Chumps’ total points for, so there’s that.
Ruminations and Cogitations (I’ll Take You There edition)
Week 4 Awards: Guns gets the Hard Luck for losing with 113.5 points. MSG gets the Dumb Luck for winning with 91.
For the second week in row we had a game decided by .5 points, so the Bad Beat goes to Maulers. As I said last week you can point to many reasons why a team loses by a margin that narrow, so I’ll go with Jason Myers missing an extra point. Ouch.
Week 4 Overreactions
- Your MVP race through four games:
- Brock Purdy
- Ken Walker
- Josh Allen
- Bryce Young
- My pick for Defensive Player of the Year is . . . Buffalo’s Greg Rousseau.
- Fugazi rankings, 3-1 teams:
- Giants
- Browns
- Raiders
- Ravens
- Jaguars
- Bears
- Bills
- Seahawks
- Past readers of the R&C are aware of my, shall we say, admiration for Sydney Sweeney, but even I think her naked gambling ad is too trashy.
- Colors we need to see as the primary jersey color in NFL unis:
- Maroon
- Pink (yeah I said it)
- Garnet (dark red)
- Silver
- Yellow
Team of the Week
| QB | Drake Maye | MSG (bench) | 27 |
| RB | Kenneth Walker | Factory | 29 |
| RB | Kyle Monangai | Weasels (PS) | 27 |
| WR | Tetairoa McMillan | SOL | 31 |
| WR | CeeDee Lamb | Great One | 24 |
| TE | Sam LaPorta | Yankees | 18 |
| WR/TE | Nico Collins/Tyquan Thornton | Weasels/FA | 23 |
| PK | Will Reichard | Yankees | 19 |
| DST | Vikings/Bears | Maulers/MSG | 19 |
| Total | 217 |
Top 5 Plays of the Week
5. I stick to my belief that one-handed catches are overrated, but when they win you a road division game against an undefeated team, you get a place in the top 5
4. The Eagles’ Darius Cooper pulled off a much better catch on a ball that looked like an INT all the way
Here it is in slo-mo, with a soundtrack
3. According to this tweet, Ken Walker hit a top speed of 21.21 MPH on this run . . .
. . . now watch this iso on Raiders CB Taron Johnson and tell me how fast he ran
2. Dionte Banks had a walkoff pick 6 to ice the Giants’ win over the Cardinals
1. George Kittle housed one from 56 yards to put the Broncos away
Trickeration of the Week: The Chiefs ran a nice fake punt against the Raiders
Watch #21 for the Chiefs, he’s wide open out to the left before the punter even takes off. That’s a well-designed play right there.
Coaching Chowderheads
I ripped Schotty last week for poor game management in clutch time, so I have to give him credit for getting it right this week.
BUT. . . he screwed up the end of the first half when sent Aubrey out for a 65 yard field goal with 30 seconds left. Yes, he can make those, but if he misses you give the Texans the ball pretty much in field goal range, which is exactly what happened. Houston only needed to gain nine yards to kick a 54 yarder of their own at the gun.
In today’s NFL, you can only attempt ridiculously long field goals before halftime when there’s no time left for any following plays. Chowderhead.
Man, Saturday was a bad day to be a college football coach in Colorado. First, Colorado State’s season is going so well that they apparently fired their defensive coordinator – before the game even ended.
Then there’s Deion. First, someone left the CU playbook in a hotel bar the night before their game against Texas Tech. Then they went out and dropped their third straight (combined score – 93-27), which included a sequence where they had eight men on the field, called timeout, then came out of that timeout with only nine men on the field. Then after the game he threw his entire QB room under the bus.
I am shocked – SHOCKED – that any of this is happening. Who could have foreseen it, after CU hired a “coach” whose only real accomplishment was swiping Travis Hunter away from his alma mater? He rode Hunter and Shedeur to success at Jackson State and to headlines at CU, but the question was always what would happen after they left? Looks like we’re finding out.
We haven’t had a Fat Guy TD yet this season but Washington had a cool Fat Guy catch and run for a first down
Will Levis Memorial Bonehead Play
Non-NFL Play of the Week
Harvard pulled off a Hail Mary Hook & Ladder to beat Colgate
Bonus: Jackson Churio walked off the Padres on Sunday. Worth it for the crowd noise.
Trivia question: Of the six WRs with a career yards per reception average greater than 20, only one started their career after 1965. Name him (you won’t).
Hints:
- He played from 1988-1997
- He played in 114 games, all but 8 of them for the same NFC team
- For his career he had 267 receptions for 5357 yards and 28 TDs
- He still holds the record for most receiving yards in a game, with 336 in 1989
- He had a cool nickname
Funniest GREATEST vid ever
I do not have the words to express the sheer awesomeness of this video
Uni watch, week 4
Carolina Panthers vs Detroit Lions
This game had two teams wearing unis that were almost photo negatives of each other. The Panthers went with all black with blue highlights, and the Lions were all white with blue highlights, creating an effect where they pretty much canceled each other out. As you might expect, it didn’t work for me. At least the Lions kept their regular helmet; the Panthers’ black logo on black helmet just blends together to these old eyes.
Panthers: D+
Lions: C-
Cleveland Browns
Oh God no. An all brown uni is bad enough, but under no circumstances should the Browns ever wear a helmet color other than orange. Two years ago I bashed the Browns regular uni because the orange was too bright, but I’d like to offer up a retraction after seeing this disaster. And they named this abomination the “Alpha Dawg” uniform. Gack.
Browns: F
The Commish Track is Waiting On A Friend by The Rolling Stones. I forgot how unintentionally hilarious the video is.
Stat of the week: Minkah Fitzpatrick’s second quarter interception ended a streak of 20 games, 636 pass attempts, and 637 DAYS since the Jets last interception.
Anyone else think Doug Flutie looks like a cross between Tom Cruise and Henry Winkler?
The WAG of the Week is Hailee Steinfeld, Josh Allen’s wife and baby mama.
Bye weeks start in week 5 so check your lineups. And if you want a good laugh, take a look at mine.
Take us home, Boss . . .
Some hazard from Harvard was skunked on beer, playin’ backyard bombardier
And Scotland Yard was trying hard, they sent some dude with a calling card, he said, “Do what you like, but don’t do it here”
Well I jumped up, turned around, spit in the air, fell on the ground, asked him which was the way back home
He said, Take a right at the light, keep goin’ straight until night, and then boys, you’re on your own
Good luck to everyone (almost) in week 5,
The Commish
Trivia answer: Willie “Flipper” Anderson
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