With four weeks left in the regular season:
1. x-Multiple Scoregasms (8-2)
2. Big Guns (7-3); beat Snappers
3. Sons of Liberty (6-4)
4. Deep Snappers (7-3)
5. Season 27 Champs (6-4)
6. Electric Mayhem (4-6); 1-1 vs Torpedoes/Swerve; 977 points
7. Damn The Torpedoes (4-6); beat Maulers, Weasels, Swerve
8. DoubleSwerve (4-6); beat Maulers
9. Maulers (4-6); beat Weasels
10. Weasels (4-6)
11. The Dirty Yankees (3-7); beat Factory
12. Freedom Factory (3-7)
MSG has clinched a playoff spot and will win the East with a win OR a Mayhem loss.
Guns and Snappers have most likely clinched playoff spots but you know the drill – seven wins is a virtual playoff lock but it’s too early for me to officially call it.
MSG 167, Torpedoes 57: Jonathan Taylor damn near won this one by himself.
Snappers 126.5, SOL 93.5: Must be nice to leave a 27 point RB on your bench and still win by 33.
Mayhem 107.5, Guns 90.5: Mayhem was on a three game losing streak and had Cojones, Chase, Rice and Ferguson on their bye. This game makes no sense.
Chumps 100, Factory 77: Don’t look now but Chumps have won four straight.
Maulers 94, Yankees 80: I wonder how long it takes for this result to come up at family gatherings each year. I also wonder who’s more annoying about it.
Swerve 80, Weasels 64: I tried but I can’t find anything noteworthy about this one.
Ruminations and Cogitations (I Wish You Knew edition)
Week 10 Awards: Hard Luck to SOL with 93.5, Dumb Luck to Swerve with 80.
MSG’s 167 points was our fifth-highest regular season score, but right now I don’t know if their 110 point margin of victory is the record. The website has all the game scores going back to 2001 but they’re not in any kind of searchable database (I track the high scores manually). I’ve had it in the back of my head for a while now to compile all those scores into my own database but I haven’t because that’s a lot of games and there comes a point where you can put too much work into a fantasy football league. So until that happens let’s assume that 110 points is the new record.
Unfortunately the game histories don’t include the lineup scoring details but starting in 2017 it tracks those dumb “Fantasy Journalist” recaps which gives a little visibility into who scored but not enough. I think it would be fun to click on a result from 2005 and see who the stars were. Anyone else remember Matt Hasselbeck, Rudi Johnson, Santana Moss, Todd Heap, and Nate Kaeding?
I remember Nate Kaeding because in 2011 I drafted him as the first kicker off the board, and he blew out his knee on the OPENING KICKOFF OF THE SEASON and was lost for the year. It earned him a spot on my inaugural F-You list alongside Calvin Williams, Eddie Royal, Andy Dalton and Kirk Cousins. F-You Nate Kaeding, F-You.
Team of the Week
| QB | Davis Mills | FA | 28 |
| RB | Jonathan Taylor | MSG | 46 |
| RB | Jahmyr Gibbs | MSG | 35 |
| WR | Drake London | SOL | 18 |
| WR | Jalen Nailor | FA | 18 |
| TE | Trey McBride | Snappers | 22.5 |
| WR/TE | George Kittle | Yankees | 18.5 |
| PK | Jason Myers | Mayhem | 15 |
| DST | Broncos/Jets | Maulers/FA | 26 |
| Total | 227 |
Top 5 Plays of the Week (Two-Fer Edition)
5. The Jets had kick return and punt return TDs on consecutive touches against the Browns
4. JT got some great downfield blocking on his 83 yard TD run . . .
. . . and walked off the Falcons in OT
3. Jahmyr Gibbs ran all over the Commanders
2. Parker Washington beat double coverage in the back of end zone . . .
. . . and later did a Nestea plunge to cap off his punt return TD
- De’Von Achane buried the Bills
Bonus Fat Guy TD – Sheldon Rankins sealed the Texans’ win over the Jags, and clinched a Scorigami to boot!
Week 10 Overreactions
- The Patriots are all the way back. They’ll win the AFC East and will go to the Superb Owl if they don’t have to travel to Arrowhead.
- I’ve gone on a few times about how this is Buffalo’s year, and how Coach Nerd shouldn’t have a job, so naturally the Dolphins crushed the Bills. So I’ll lay off the Coach Nerd bashing (for now), and proclaim that while the Bills are NOT ASS they are definitely FUGAZI.
- Superb Owl LX will be between the Patriots and the winner of Seahawks/Rams in week 11.
- God, I’m getting tired of the Eagles doing just enough to win every week. Someone needs to blow them out and put Nick Sirianni back on the hot seat where he belongs.
- The Google vs. Disney dispute is like the government shutdown – a pissing contest between billionaires where the only people affected are the powerless millions who actually use the services. I’m also sick of hearing about them both.
Ol’ Nico Harrison got his walking papers today, a mere nine months too late. It must be a bittersweet celebration for Mavs fans who got the change they so desperately wanted but will never get what they truly wish for – Luka back in a Mavs uniform.
I don’t follow the Mavs closely, and I admit I’d never heard of Nico prior to the trade, but from what I read about the trade and how it was conducted it was obvious that he was an incompetent GM. But even with his ineptitude I truly hope he lands another GM gig, so that the Mavs can trade him Anthony Davis. Preferably for a 25 year old first team all-NBAer.
The Non-NFL Play of the Week was maybe the greatest college football catch ever, complete with an all-time Gus Johnson meltdown.
Not to bring things down but I’m sure you all heard about the Marshawn Kneeland tragedy. I won’t go into details about it but three years ago my closest friend growing up took his life in a situation that I saw coming but felt powerless to do anything about.
In reading about Kneeland I saw an online comment to the effect of “Wasn’t he running from the police? If so, why was he running?” My initial reaction was anger and disgust before I realized that it wasn’t that long ago when I might have asked the same question, with the obvious implication that if you’re dumb enough to run then you get what you deserve. After my friend’s suicide I’ve started to realize that it’s not always that simple, that we don’t ever know what’s inside someone’s head or what they might be going through.
After Kneeland died his teammate Solomon Thomas said what I wish I could have.
I wish you knew it was going to be okay. I wish you knew the pain wouldn’t last and how loved you are. I wish you knew how bad we wanted you to stay.
RIP Marshawn.
Now it’s time for everyone’s favorite game – Name Those Colors!
The rules are simple – identify the NFL team from their official colors (no Googling please).
1. Speed blue, gray, white
2. Midnight green, silver, black, charcoal
3. Deep steel blue, battle red
4. Purple, black, metallic gold, red
5. Powder blue, sunshine gold, white
6. Red, Bay orange, black, grey, pewter
7. Royal blue, blue, silver, silver-green, white
8. Nautical blue, red, New Century silver
9. Honolulu blue, silver, black, white
10. College navy, action green, wolf gray
Answers to follow.
The Commish Track is Werewolves of London by Warren Zevon.
The late Mr. Zevon was inducted into the Rock Hall of Fame last week with an emotional speech by David Letterman.
Trivia question: Who is the only QB to finish in the top 12 in fantasy points in each of his last four games?1
Answers to Name Those Colors!
10. Seattle Seahawks
The Nepo Babe of the Week is Dylan Penn, daughter of Sean Penn and Robin Wright. Thank God she looks like her mother. A lot like her mother.
Week 11 is upon us, and here’s a reminder that by rule the trade deadline is the day before week 12 kicks off, which means this year the deadline is Wednesday, November 19 at 10:59pm Central time. I’ll also remind you that while I can set the date I can’t set the time, so we’re stuck with 10:59pm CT. Any trades emailed to me before the deadline will be approved or rejected before the Thursday game kicks off.
We’ll get out of there on this: “My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We’ll see about that!” – Stewart Francis
Good luck to everyone (almost) in week 11,
The Commish
- Jacoby Brissett ↩︎
Ruminations & Cogitations 
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