If the season ended today …
1. Big Guns (7-2), beat MSG
2. Multiple Scoregasms (7-2)
3. Sons Of Liberty (6-3)
4. Deep Snappers (6-3)
5. Season 27 Champs (5-4)
6. Damn The Torpedoes (4-5), beat Weasels
7. Weasels (4-5)
8. DoubleSwerve (3-6), 1-0 vs. Maulers/Yankees
9. The Dirty Yankees (3-6), 1-1 vs. Factory/Mayhem, 2-1 division record, outscored Maulers
10. Maulers (3-6), beat Factory
11. Freedom Factory (3-6), beat Mayhem
12. Electric Mayhem (3-6)
- Guns and MSG have probably clinched playoff spots but I won’t call it until they get to eight wins.
- Amazingly, MSG could clinch the East this week with a win and losses by the other East teams.
SOL 163, Factory 86.5: SOL posted the 8th highest regular season score ever, and if they’d started Flacco over Daniels it would have been the 2nd highest.
Snappers 123, Yankees 95: Starting Caleb over Goff sure did pay off (huh-huh, that rhymed).
Guns 107.5, Maulers 100: The unstoppable Guns train rolls on.
Weasels 93, Mayhem 90.5: I didn’t trade Jameson Williams because I thought he was about to break out, then I benched him at the last minute for flippin’ Wan’Dale Robinson, lost (naturally) and fell to the bottom of the rankings. Why do I even do this?
Chumps 92, Torpedoes 81.5: The RBs were the difference in this one, as the firm of Harvey & Spears outscored Gainwell & Mitchell 17-4.
MSG 90, Swerve 55: MSG has a league-best five game win streak.
Ruminations and Cogitations (Norris Weese edition)
Week 9 Awards: The Hard Luck goes to Maulers with 100 points, and the Dumb Luck goes to MSG with 90. Swerve gets the Bench Mob (60 – 55).
Team of the Week
| QB | Caleb Williams | Snappers | 36 |
| RB | Christian McCaffery | Factory | 29 |
| RB | Rico Dowdle | Swerve | 26 |
| WR | Drake London | SOL | 29 |
| WR | Tee Higgins | SOL | 26 |
| TE | Brock Bowers | SOL | 37 |
| WR/TE | Colston Loveland | FA | 26 |
| PK | Ka’imi Fairbairn | SOL | 18 |
| DST | Titans | FA | 21 |
| Total | 238 |
Top 5 Plays of the Week
5. Brian Robinson trucked some dude on his way to the end zone
4. Matthew Stafford dropped a perfect dime to Puka, who did what Puka does
3. We have a new NFL record for longest field goal, though I doubt it will last very long
2. Tee Higgins made one of the best TD catches of the year vs. the Bears …
1. But with the game on the line, the Bengals defense parted like the Red Sea for Colston Loveland
Bonus Trickeration – after a little razzle dazzle, D.J. Moore threw a TD pass to Caleb Williams
Bonus Fat Guy TD – this one is borderline but we haven’t had one in a while so I’m allowing it
They say October is the best sports month of the year, because it’s the only month where all four major American sports leagues are playing. The MLB playoffs and NFL/NBA/NHL regular seasons, not to mention college football, Premier League, Champions League and even little ol’ MLS has its playoffs going (isn’t that cute).
With all that going on, I couldn’t narrow it down to a single non-NFL play of the week, so you get three!
Top 3 Non-NFL Plays of the Week
First up, SMU did this.
It may not be the Ponies’ best win post-DP, but it was the most satisfying. Even more than blowing out Houston in 1992. Somehow it was SMU’s first home win over a top ten team since 1974, which I couldn’t believe when I first heard it. You’re telling me the Pony Express never beat a top ten team at home? Maybe the Southwest Conference wasn’t as great as that 30 For 30 would have us believe.
Then a few hours later the Dodgers closed out the Blue Jays.
It might not have been the best World Series but it was the craziest.
But then today . . . I don’t know that I have the words.
That was Mickey van de Ven, the Tottenham Hotspur defender I fawned over in the Week 1 R&C, scoring the best goal you will ever see (just trust me on that).
If you’re not a soccer nerd like me, you only need to know two things: 1) that’s a goal that most attackers couldn’t score, and 2) Mickey VDV is not an attacker, he’s a CENTRAL DEFENDER.
Central defenders are historically big lumbering guys who are the last line of defense in front of the goalkeeper. Think Derian Hatcher from the late 90s Dallas Stars, or Patrick Ewing from his Georgetown days (sorry, I don’t know any more recent enormous defensive centers). But Mickey is unique in that he’s a central defender who’s also the fastest player in the Premier League, and that’s a combination that no one’s ever seen before. And the results are jaw-dropping.
He’s my favorite Spurs player, and I will shed sports tears the day he leaves (because they all do).
Week 9 Overreactions
- If you’re the Cardinals, how can you go back to Kyler? We all know Jacoby Briskett will come crashing down soon, but the Cards offense at least looks functional now. Who knew that throwing accurately to Marvin Harrison Jr. and Trey McBride was the answer all along?
- Of course, they were playing the Cowboys, who could make Norris Weese look like John Elway.
- The Bills still have their flaws, but if their defense can play like it did against the Chiefs I still think they can run the table in the AFC.
- I continue to be amazed that Coach Nerd is still employed. It almost makes me wonder if the Dolphins are perversely torturing him by making him stay.
- Commish’s MVP rankings
- Josh Allen
- Jonathan Taylor
- Drake Maye
- Matthew Stafford
As I expected, the list of Superb Owl losing QBs by school was longer, both in the number of schools and in the time it took to Google them all. To keep it under control I only listed the QBs that started the game, because – surprise – they didn’t all finish. So only Craig Morton gets credit for the loss to the Cowboys in Supe XII, though I have to admit I want to know where Norris Weese went to school (answer: Ole Miss. What an age we live in.)
| Cal | 4 | Kapp, Morton (2), Goff |
| Miami | 4 | Kelly |
| Georgia | 3 | Tarkenton |
| Stanford | 3 | Elway |
| Michigan | 3 | Brady |
| Purdue | 2 | Dawson, Griese |
| Notre Dame | 2 | Lamonica, Theismann |
| Navy | 2 | Staubach |
| LSU | 2 | Woodley, Burrow |
| Maryland | 2 | Esiason, O’Donnell |
| Northern Iowa | 2 | Warner |
| Boston College | 2 | Hasselbeck, Ryan |
| Tennessee | 2 | Manning |
| Texas Tech | 2 | Mahomes |
| Michigan St. | 1 | Morrall |
| UCLA | 1 | Kilmer |
| Nebraska | 1 | Ferragamo |
| Youngstown St. | 1 | Jaworski |
| Augustana | 1 | Anderson |
| Pitt | 1 | Marino |
| Illinois | 1 | Eason |
| Northeast Louisiana | 1 | Humphries |
| Washington St. | 1 | Bledsoe |
| Southern Miss | 1 | Favre |
| Washington | 1 | Chandler |
| Alcorn St. | 1 | McNair |
| Penn St. | 1 | Collins |
| Delaware | 1 | Gannon |
| Southwest Louisiana | 1 | Delhomme |
| Syracuse | 1 | McNabb |
| Florida | 1 | Grossman |
| Miami (Ohio) | 1 | Roethlisberger |
| Nevada | 1 | Kaepernick |
| Wisconsin | 1 | Wilson |
| Auburn | 1 | Newton |
| Eastern Illinois | 1 | Garoppolo |
| Oklahoma | 1 | Hurts |
| Iowa St. | 1 | Purdy |
- Still not listed: Texas, USC, Ohio St., Oregon, A&M.
- And yes SMU isn’t on either list but their only candidate would have been Dandy Don who got really close to Supes I & II. I’m not sure there’s been an SMU starting QB in the NFL since.
- There are a lot of surprises on this list but my favorite is that Vince Ferragamo went to Nebraska. What, did he throw five passes a year? I didn’t even know they let Italians in Nebraska in the 1970s.
Trivia question: Name the only player in NFL history with 275+ passing yards, 50+ rushing yards, and 20+ receiving yards in a game.1
The Commish Track of the week is Mama, I’m Coming Home by Ozzy Osbourne.
Uni Watch: I didn’t hate the Packers’ 1923 throwbacks as much as I thought I would. I’m as surprised as you.
The navy blue and “dark gold” numbers and stripes aren’t hideous, and the tan pants are a hell of a lot better than the mustard color the Steelers wore last week (and the Packers have worn with previous throwbacks). And the helmets painted to look like old timey leather helmets work too. A solid uni that doesn’t hurt my eyes.
The Giants trotted out a 1980s throwback that at first didn’t look all that different to me.
That helmet was always dumb, with a boring GIANTS logo on a darker blue than the rest of the uni. I prefer the current “ny” logo which I think is an even older throwback that they kept. But I like the red striping on the jersey, which is what’s missing from their regular uni. So if they crossed the current helmet with this jersey I think they’d have something.
Speaking of dumb helmets …
I get it, it’s a throwback to the bicentennial year 1976 when everything was “yay America” and the Cowboys wore that helmet the whole season. But 1) there’s no reason to keep bringing it back, and 2) they suck every time they wear it. I could do without them.
UPDATE: the Cowboys went 11-4 with the red stripe in 1976, and are 2-3 since. So they don’t suck every time, but the three losses are really bad.
The Nepo Babe of the Week is Katherine Schwarzenegger. Famous parents: take a wild guess.
We’ll get out of here on this oldie from Jonathan Winters: “”My parents sent me to a child psychologist. That kid didn’t help me at all.”
Good luck to everyone (almost) in week 10,
The Commish
- Caleb Williams, week 9 2025 vs. Cincinnati ↩︎
Ruminations & Cogitations 
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