The Dirty Yankees are the 2025 CFFL Champions. Congrats to Josh on winning his first league title in only his third year.
I’ll leave it to Josh to work out the trophy handoff with his father-in-law’s brother-in-law. It needs to be in person though as it’s shipping days are over.
Ruminations and Cogitations (Can We Get This Kid Some Pancakes? edition)
Our final transaction fees were $880, making the total payout pool a record-breaking $1780.
| Draft fees | $900.00 |
| Transaction fees | $880.00 |
| Total | $1780.00 |
| Champion (Yankees) | $765.00 |
| Runner-up (Guns) | $420.00 |
| Semi-finalist (Snappers) | $210.00 |
| Semi-finalist (Maulers) | $210.00 |
| #1 seed (Snappers) | $100.00 |
| Gator Bowl (Mayhem) | $75.00 |
The rest of you owe for your transaction fees. Emails will go out tonight and payments are due to Carl by January 15, 2026.
CFFL Championship Notebook
- Yankees are the eighth current CFFL franchise to win a title, leaving Swerve, Factory, MSG and Chumps as our non-title winners.
- Yankees’ 53.25 winning margin was by far the biggest blowout in championship game history (since 2001)
- 53.25 – Yanks vs Guns, 2025
- 36.50 – Schizo vs SOL, 2001
- 33.25 – Maulers vs Weasels, 2021
- 30.50 – SOL vs Irish, 2014
- Yankees’ 131 points was the second highest in championship game history
- 145 – Maulers, 2021
- 131 – Yanks, 2025
- 124 – Dirty Deeds, 2012
- 117 – SOL, 2011 & 2013
- Yankees’ three playoff game scores (141, 131.5, 131) all make the top 15 postseason scores, which probably makes for the highest three-game average in history (134.5)
- This was the third title for the #7 seed which trails only the top three seeds in titles won.
- #1 seed – 9
- #2 seed – 5
- #3 seed – 5
- #7 seed – 3
- #8 seed – 2
- #4 seed – 1
- #5 seed – 1
- The #6 seed remains the only seed to not produce a league winner.
- It’s hard to believe but Derrick Henry’s 45 points was not the championship game record. That belongs to Alvin Kamara’s 53 points for Snappers in 2020, which might be our highest player score for any week.
- I don’t know if Guns’ double goose-egg was a first for the championship game but the all-time low score was 18 points by Schizo in 2003. Granted that was before we changed the scoring rules but 18 points was ridiculously low even then so I suspect that had to be a triple goose-egg at least.
The 2026 draft order is set
1. Electric Mayhem
2. Damn The Torpedoes
3. Weasels
4. DoubleSwerve
5. Freedom Factory
6. Maulers
7. Big Guns
8. Season 27 Champs
9. Sons Of Liberty
10. Multiple Scoregasms
11. Deep Snappers
12. The Dirty Yankees
All CFFL – First Team
| QB | Josh Allen | Guns | 362 |
| RB | Jonathan Taylor | MSG | 305 |
| RB | Christian McCaffrey | Factory | 303 |
| WR | Jaxon Smith-Njigba | Snappers | 229 |
| WR | Puka Nacua | Maulers | 223 |
| TE | Trey McBride | Snappers | 235.5 |
| WR/TE | George Pickens | Factory | 189 |
| PK | Jason Myers | Mayhem | 192 |
| DST | Seahawks | MSG | 258 |
All CFFL – Second Team
| QB | Drake Maye | MSG | 334 |
| RB | Bijan Robinson | Snappers | 282 |
| RB | Jahmyr Gibbs | MSG | 265 |
| WR | Amon-Ra St. Brown | Chumps | 186 |
| WR | Ja’Marr Chase | Mayhem | 170 |
| TE | Kyle Pitts | Guns | 149 |
| WR/TE | Chris Olave | Guns | 161 |
| PK | Brandon Aubrey | Chumps | 184 |
| DST | Texans | Chumps | 241 |
- Chase and St. Brown are the only first-teamers from last year to make either list
- Last year’s #1 player overall – Lamar Jackson – was the #20 QB this year
- McBride was the biggest positional advantage by far
- I’m absolutely stunned that Kyle Pitts was our #2 TE #ToldYouHeWasAThing
- Congrats to Chumps on drafting the #2 kicker in the 8th round #DifferenceMaker
- I think our next scoring change needs to be boosting WR scoring. I think we should give WRs a half-point per reception and bump TEs up to a full point
- We may have bumped DST scoring a little too much but I’m ok with it
Top 5 Plays – CFFL Championship Game Edition
5. Deonte Banks had a 95-yard kickoff return for the Giants
4. Trevor Lawrence scored the first of his two TDs runs (and almost won me a championship in my other league)
3. Chris Olave had a sneaky great season
2. Zay Flowers scored a TD??
1. Derrick Henry, MFers
Josh better be sending some of his winnings to Henry’s foundation.
Let’s see how your Commish did with his overreactions this year
GOOD
- In the long pantheon of shitty retread Cowboys defensive coordinators (Rob Ryan, Monte Kiffin, Rod Marinelli, Mike Nolan, Mike Zimmer), Matt Eberflus might just be the worst (week 2)
- Mike Vrabel and Liam Coen are your NFL Coach of the Year front-runners (week 5)
- The Falcons are the most schizo team in the NFL. I have no idea how they’re going to play from one week to the next (week 6)
- Did I mention that Tampa Bay is FUGAZI? Because they’re FUGAZI. No one who loses to this Saints team at home is even remotely serious. (week 14)
BAD
- This is Buffalo’s year (week 1)
- The Colts will run away with the AFC South, and if Indiana Jones keeps this up he’ll be in the MVP conversation (week 2)
- CORRECTION: There was a minor, almost unnoticeable misspelling in the week 5 overreactions regarding NFL Coach of the Year frontrunners, where “Shane Steichen” was mis-keyed as “Liam Coen”. We regret the error. (week 7)
- The Bengals are 4-8 with a -94 point differential, but I’ll take them to win the AFC North. The rest of the division is FUGAZI. (week 13)
We have a new candidate for greatest commercial ever.
That’s some incredible self-awareness by Nabers, and a slick move by IHOP to steal focus from Waffle House, which is where real fantasy losers get banished to. The kid is funny but my favorite part is the cackling waitress.
The Commish Track is You And Me On The Rock by Brandi Carlile.
Trivia question: Besides Yankees, which CFFL franchises have won just one league title?1
Boy I don’t know about this one
Christian Bale looks predictably awesome as Al Davis, but Nicolas Cage . . . I guess the best thing I can say is “let’s wait and see.”
The movie I really want to see is “The Making Of ‘Madden’” starring Frank Caliendo as Nic Cage as John Madden.
If the Cowboys beat the shitty Giants they’ll finish 8-8-1, and the Rangers were 81-81 this year. I’m no numerologist but that has to contain some deeper meaning.
The Mavs could finish 41-41 but they would have to go 29-19 to make that happen. And even FC Dallas went 11-11-12.
Conclusion: If it weren’t for the Stars, Dallas would be the most mid-ass sports town west of Atlanta.
The Non-NFL Play of the Year – nay, of All Time – is whatever the hell this was.
How could Notre Dame not want to be a part of that?
The 15 Modern-Era Hall of Fame finalists were announced today.
No-Brainers
Drew Brees
Larry Fitzgerald
Adam Vinatieri
Jason Witten
They Probably Won’t But I Would
Darren Woodson
Their Day Will Come, But It Is Not This Day
Frank Gore
Torry Holt
Reggie Wayne
Did He Play Long Enough?
Luke Kuechly
They’re D Linemen So Who Knows?
Terrell Suggs
Kevin Williams
They’re O Linemen So Who Cares?
Willie Anderson
Jahri Evans
Marshal Yanda
If He Gets In Before Jim Plunkett We Riot
Eli Manning
In addition there are five Seniors Category Finalists that are voted on separately.
Yes, Can’t Believe They’re Not In Already
Kenny Anderson
Roger Craig
No, Enough With The Damn 1970s Steelers
L.C. Greenwood
It’s Ridiculous That Owners Are Even Eligible
Robert Kraft
Not Until His College Career Is Over
Bill Belichick
The Nepo Babe of the Week is Lily-Rose Depp. Famous parents: Johhny Depp and Vanessa Paradis.
Other nepo babes who didn’t make the cut:
- Ireland Baldwin
- Dakota Johnson
- Gwyneth Paltrow
- Lily Collins
- Zoe Kravitz
- Gia Mantegna
I have an idea for next year’s babe theme but it may court controversy. We’ll see if I go with it or return to a standard non-themed list. Either way they’re still babes so it’s all good.
We’re definitely having a year-end get together after skipping it last year. I’m still targeting the division round weekend of Jan 17-18 so keep your calendars clear if you can. We usually do the afternoon games which will be 3:30p on Sat 1/17 or 2:00p on Sun 1/18. Stay tuned.
And so we come to the end of another awesome season. Thanks to all of you for continuing to put yourselves through this insanity every year. As I reach my mid-50s part of me wonders how much longer this can go on (can we really keep doing this into our 60s and 70s?), but a much bigger part of me can’t imagine ever stopping. I’d hate to see where my sports obsessions would turn if I didn’t have the CFFL around.
We’ll end it where we started, with a one-liner from the great Steven Wright: “If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer?”
Happy New Year! See you at Texas Live.
The Commish
- Weasels (2015), Big Guns (2018), Damn The Torpedoes (2019) ↩︎
Ruminations & Cogitations 
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