CFFL Championship
#7 The Dirty Yankees vs. #5 Big Guns
Previous result: Guns def. Yankees 80-76.5 in week 5
Ruminations and Cogitations (Warm Winds Blowin’ edition)
Sorry for the late posting but you were warned last week. My kid and their partner are visiting from Chicago and I’m part host/part Uber driver for the week. I have even less time today than I thought so this will be an extra light one. I’ll try to make up for it with a Week 17 spectacular next week.
This is our first ever #5 vs. #7 matchup in the championship game, and I’d bet none of us saw this matchup coming. Congrats to Guns and Yankees for getting this far, Guns by knocking out the #4 and #6 seeds and Yanks by taking out #1 and #2.
The updated payouts:
| Draft fees | $900.00 |
| Transaction fees | $874.00 |
| Total | $1774.00 |
| Champion | $762.00 |
| Runner-up | $418.50 |
| Semi-finalist (Snappers) | $209.25 |
| Semi-finalist (Maulers) | $209.25 |
| #1 seed (Snappers) | $100.00 |
| Gator Bowl (Mayhem) | $75.00 |
$1,774 is our highest total payout pool ever, surpassing last year’s $1,745.
Team of the Week
| QB | Brock Purdy/Trevor Lawrence | Maulers/Yankees | 31 |
| RB | Ashton Jeanty | Guns | 30 |
| RB | Chase Brown | SOL | 28 |
| WR | Puka Nacua | Maulers | 34 |
| WR | Chris Olave | Guns | 26 |
| TE | George Kittle | Yankees | 20.5 |
| WR/TE | Alec Pierce/Parker Washington | Torpedoes/FA | 20 |
| PK | Charlie Smyth | FA | 20 |
| DST | Saints | Torpedoes | 28 |
| Total | 237.5 |
Nine of twelve draft slots are set for next season.
If Guns wins:
1. Mayhem
2. Torpedoes
3. Weasels
4. Swerve
5. Factory
6. Yankees
7. Maulers
8. Chumps
9. SOL
10. MSG
11. Snappers
12. Guns
If Yankees wins:
1. Mayhem
2. Torpedoes
3. Weasels
4. Swerve
5. Factory
6. Maulers
7. Guns
8. Chumps
9. SOL
10. MSG
11. Snappers
12. Yankees
Top 5 Plays of the Week
5. 49ers LB Dee Winters sealed the win over the Colts with a pick 6
4. Kyle Williams somehow caught this
3. Kenneth Gainwell did what?
2. Caleb Williams hit D.J. Moore deep to beat the Packers in OT
1. The Seahawks hit the biggest two-point conversion of the year to beat the Rams
Here’s the list of players that will come available for next year’s draft.
RB De’Von Achane
RB Saquon Barkley
RB Chase Brown
RB Jahmyr Gibbs
RB Breece Hall
RB Christian McCaffrey
RB Bijan Robinson
RB Kyren Williams
WR Ja’Marr Chase
WR Nico Collins
WR Mike Evans
WR Puka Nacua
WR George Pickens
TE Sam LaPorta
Mayhem picked a good year to win the Gator Bowl.
In related news, the #1 pick is available for pick swaps in the 2nd round and at least one other even number round. Hit me up when the offseason trading period opens – in 6.5 months.
The Non-NFL Play of the Week is Cooper Flagg posterizing some dude.
The Commish Track is Texas by Chris Rea. Yet another musician who just died, and this is the only song of his I know.
I like this song but it has a faulty premise. He and his wife are fed up with how “crazy” things are getting, and the wife is worried that “someone’s gonna get killed out there”.
His solution? “Texas.” Because nothing says safety like moving to the gun-totinest state in the union. Unless of course you have one (or more) of your own but he doesn’t say anything about that, he just goes on about warm winds and big long roads, as poets will do. I guess when you have that you can chance the rest.
In any case, I dig the song. RIP Chris Rea.
Trivia question: Fill in the blank – NFL rushing yards leaders through week 16.1
1. James Cook – 1532
2. Jonathan Taylor – 1489
3. De’Von Achane – 1267
4. Derrick Henry – 1253
5. Bijan Robinson – 1250
6. ______________ – 1147
7. Jahmyr Gibbs – 1102
8. Kyren Williams – 1100
9. Saquon Barkley – 1072
10. Christian McCaffrey – 1039
The Nepo Babe of the Week is Carys Douglas, offspring of Michael Douglas and HOF Babe Catherine Zeta-Jones. I try not to showcase babes that are younger than my kid but it’s week 16 and I’m running out of choices. Besides she springs from Hollywood royalty so she gets special consideration.
And then there were two. By this time next week (actually in six days) we will crown our lowest-seeded champion in a decade. Will it be the original CFFL lifer, or the baby-faced newbie?
We’ll wrap it up with the poignant, enduring words of Cousin Eddie who said, “Merry Christmas! Shitter was full!”
Merry Christmas, and may the best team win.
The Commish
- Javonte Williams ↩︎
Ruminations & Cogitations 
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